last night

Watched part of a disturbing documentary about real dolls as suggested by Chris. Then I did a little research and found that Itunes sold other documentaries made by BBC. I downloaded one called "Too Ugly to Love" about people with body dysmorphic disorder. One girl had 7 nose jobs, the last one which would leave her nose deformed permanently. Surgeons refused to touch her nose, and one finally agreed to do it but she would have to get injections every year with a filler in order to keep the tip up.. Her family went 67,000 pounds in debt allowing her to do the surgeries, believing that when she achieved the perfect nose she'd get over her disorder which left her a recluse for 2 years.

BDD however isn't something external, it's something completely internal. It's got the highest suicide risks out of any branch of anxiety disorders, 1 out of 4 people with BDD kill themselves. It's treatable, but most people fail to seek help because they're afraid they're going to be judged as being overly vain or narcissistic, when it's the opposite, a belief that your appearance is so horrifically ugly that you can't function in society.

Another girl was BEAUTIFUL but she believed she looked like a man and never let her boyfriend see her without makeup. She underwent therapy and started to wear less makeup, and would have hysterical fits when she had to take off her mascara or let people see her with less foundation on. But she was... a stunning stunning girl with a very charming personality.

Received a cute parcel from France with a little bottle of wine and assorted chocolates. It made my day.

My dad came home today from China.